It is about myself.
All this journey, everything about my day and my now is about myself, other than you… is about my self vulnerabilities, my expectations, my well being, my safe place, my within.
It has nothing to do with those who hurt me once, who walked away, who didn’t notice. That’s totally OK… I am not meant to be for everybody. It is about me and how i feel about it. It is about myself and what that thought brings out of me.
It’s not personal. It’s never been!
An exclamation shoots out of my head whenever i caught myself thinking about stories that never happened. About the endlessly “What if’s” that are so unreal.
I caught my self human though, I caught my self uncertain. And It’s just fine to feel this way. It proves and reminds me that i don’t have all the answers… and I love that!
It keeps me from living too often in the past that it already happened. It keeps me from living too much in the future that doesn’t exist. It pulls me back to my here and now, where I rather be, where i find myself, whole, free.
And what is freedom if not the ability to be, to really exist, to appreciate what i do have, what I do give, what i receive from this life, that i have created to be beautiful regardless of all the things that are out of my hands and precisely because!?
I am here. I see you. I see my self.
This self awareness is beautiful, and it continues to lead me to uncertain paths inside myself. Isn’t it that perfect?
Certitude makes everything square. Uncertainty makes everything possible, and then, no expectations makes everything nonexistent.
There, in the very wide of that concept, and the very delicate line in between, is where peace awaits!
… And so on!